|Written by||Joe Hawley|
|Appears on||Joe Hawley Joe Hawley|
|Sung by||Hawley, Laurel Stucky, Vomitron|
Crazy F**** is a song by Joe Hawley.
"Crazy F****" is a song about the plethora of food at a farmer's market.
The song references "Scarborough Fair," a old English folk song played by Simon and Garfunkel, among others. The first verse shares its melody, and the lyrics "Parsley, Sage, Rosemary," are referenced in the shopping list/rap part of the song. This song contains samples of the fight song and various sound effects from Nintendo's "Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!!" It also contains a complete cover performed by Max Gleason of the "Green Greens" theme from Nintendo's "Kirby's Dream Land" starting at "You have more? ..." and ending at "GEWURZTRAMINER".
At the end of the song, there is a reversed clip of somebody saying "are you going to eat that disgusting food, really?" in Japanese. Japanese lyrics have appeared in other Joe Hawley songs, such as Space Station Level 7 (宇宙ステーションのレベル7)
A music video of this song, released on 5/2/17, exists here, 
The purple GameBoy seen at the beginning of the video was purchased broken as a prop by Joe, which he plans on sending as a random gift to "some dude."
Are you going to eat that crazy food? May I please have some of it too? (O I hope that it does not give you indigestion! This was once a true phantasy of mine) Shucks, it's fussing bonkers at the farmer's market We drove the gosh dang Jeep and there's no place to park it What the fuss? Cuss! Check out that lazy dude with all that crazy food handing ample samples out to non-customers! Fussing find that punk if scheisse ever gets dire Gosh dang! He's Superman! Who the heck's his supplier? Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your spaghetti! Srsly tho', he's packing chow like confetti "Ready?" Shucks! uh... ALLSPICE AMARANTH ARTICHOKE ACAI BANANA BARLEY BASIL BAY LEAVES BOK CHOI CHAI SEITAN POT PIE MARBLED RYE BEDHI'D BLACK EYED PEAS BING CHERRIES CHIOGGIA BEETS (hold the meats) GOOSEBERRIES CAYENNE CHESTNUT CHIA COCONUT CUSTARD DAHLIA DATES SAFFRON DIJON MUSTARD (You're flustered!) DURIAN CURRY KALE KASAVA CLOVE EGGPLANT FLAX DEMITASSE KAVA GARLIC KUMQUAT LYCHEE OCA ROOT JALAPENOS GARBANZOS STARFRUIT SNAKEFRUIT LAVENDER LIME KARELA KOHLRABI JUNIPER JAK WAKAME WASABI PAPAYA PAPALO MARIGOLD MANGO OREGANO SAKE LEMON LUO HAN GUO KIWI CATNIP CAROLINA REAPER EGUSI ICACO (why can't this be cheaper?) POPPIES ASPARAGUS QUEEN ANNE'S CARROTS BROCCOLI a GAC and that'll take care of us. You have more? Wherefore dost thou obtain s'uch crazy food thou crazy fuss? COLLARD GREENS BUTTER BEANS VANILLA POMEGRANATE PINEAPPLE SARSAPARILLA RAMBUTAN DRAGONFRUIT TAPIOCA ATEMOYA AKEBIA ROSE MOCHA AMANITA MUSCARIA CHIVE POTATOES WATERCRESS SPROUTS QUINOA TOMATOES PARSLEY SAGE ROSEMARY wait... Almost seems like this should be illegal. (Will these even fit in the vehicle?) WATERMELON MARIJUANA RHUBARB TAMARIND TARRAGON TURNIP SWISS CHARD BLUEBERRY CARAWAY FENNEL CACAO BOYSENBERRY CUMIN CANTALOUPE (Wow.) CELERY SESAME YAM ANISE ZENIA KOLAS GRANOLAS MARCONAS GARDENIAS LENTIL CABBAGE VITAL WHEAT GLUTEN WIENER GHOST PEPPER MUENSTER GEWURZTRAMINER APPLE FIG PEAR PEACH PINE HAZEL WALNUT BEECH SPELT MILLET TEFF TARO SHALLOT GINGER MACA FARRO YARROW KALENDULA KOMBU CHLORELLA CILANTRO PECAN CITRON PORTOBELLA PUMPKIN RADISH ONION RICE GINKGO OLIVE MAPLE ICE THYME STRAWBERRY PAPAYA CATTAIL SHERRY MULBERRY PLUM MIMOSA ARGYREIA NERVOSA CUCUMBERS MAYPOPS SHAMROCKS What's with the HEMLOCKS?! BOURBON APRICOTS SOUR TRUFFLE SAMPHIRE FLOWER SQUASH ZUCCHINI MACARONI PORCINI VERMICELLI AVOCADOS PISTACHIOS CINNAMON ROYAL JELLY PERSIMMONS HEMP HEARTS GREEN GODDESS CELASTRUS PANICULATUS KOMBUCHA and ORANGES. Cash only?! Uh, nevermind.